Talking Bottom

Guest House Paradiso

Rik and Ade finally bring Bottom to the big screen, playing Richard "Richie" Thwaite (pronounced Twat) and Edward "Eddie" Elizabeth Ndingombaba (in other words it's Richard Richard and Eddie Hitler), who run the Guest House Paradiso - the worst hotel in the world. Excitement arrives in the form of Italian movie star Gina Carbonara, seeking refuge from her ill-tempered fiance Gino Bolognese. As Richie and Eddie do their best to keep the place running, their proximity to a nuclear power plant means tonight's fish dinner is going to repeat on the guests.

Mat, Paul and Angela dribble on about the Bottom universe, BBC rights, cinema viewings, fake vomit, filming stunts in reverse, saucy nymphs and happy endings. Plus a look at the original publicity materials released by the film distributor at the time, and of course the Talking Bottom quiz!

The Guest House Paradiso behind the scenes vid we talk about can be watched here: https://youtu.be/qIH3ck-qSXc

Bottom Live 3: Hooligans Island

Richie and Eddie have been on a desert island for three years, following an ecstasy binge and a turn on a cruise liner as "The Great Arsehole and Norman", a job procured for them by theatrical impresario Sir "Pervy" Leslie McBlowjob. Now Eddie's on the Sake and Richie's got a load of shit up his back. Now they just have to deal with Cannibals, food poisoning and a massive French nuclear bomb.

Angela, Paul and Mat discuss the fourth series of Bottom that never happened, Rik and Ade's set design, scripted fluffs, the squits, love albatrosses, wank biscuits, stage violence, Angus Deayton's autocue and 90's TV references. Plus some fiendishly difficult questions with the Talking Bottom Quiz!

Bottom Live: The Big Number 2 Tour

"Have a wank!" Bottom tours the UK once more, filming Rik and Ade's performances at the Apollo Theatre Oxford. This time Richie and Eddie are planning on meeting the Queen when her procession traverses Mafeking Parade. But a combination of getting their todgers out and a massive explosion sees them banged up and sentenced to 350 years in jail. Now they must evade Geoffrey Nasty the Psychopathic Penis-Remover's boss, Horace Big (who is built like a donkey AND has a really enormous knob) long enough to escape prison and make it to tea with Her Majesty the Quim.

Paul, Mat and Angela ramble about Anne and Nick, great watch gags, pretend fluffs, the Queen's lavatory, being blocked by the Samaritans, Charles Aznavour, puns, gas, the play Cell Mates and Her Maj's Vag. Plus an absolute routing in the Talking Bottom Quiz!

Series 3 round up

Ok we're actually back really this time, look I haven't got my fingers crossed or anything. Talking Bottom returns with the season 3 round up!

Mat, Paul and Angela talk about what they've discovered about the show, Jiffy condoms, humourous riots, Mafeking, people's reaction to the podcast and the passion many have for the final series.

We're back with a shorter series from next week while the world hunkers down.

April Fools Episode - Catastrophe

Bonk! April Fools! Sorry... this was a wind up. There are, sadly, no series 4 episodes knocking about the place.

Richie and Eddie return via unusual and messy means, finding the flat in disgusting condition and the toilet still blocked with Eddie's medical experiment. A visit to the Lamb and Flag sets them right and they quickly alight on a money making scheme to keep their new landlord off their backs. But Richie's family history soon comes back to haunt him with Eddie proposing only one solution; drink.

Angela, Paul and Mat return to discuss the legendary series four episode that Rik and Ade shot but was never broadcast, the other series four scripts, cheating death,BBC commissioning processes, the ever changing layout of Hammersmith, Rik and Ade's other work in the noughties and the weight of Malibu. Plus the Talking Bottom quiz returns with ever more fiendish questions.

S3E6 - Carnival

It's the annual carnival/riot and all of Hammersmith is ablaze. Richie and Eddie use the distraction to nip out and steal a king's ransom of Malibu and a BBC TV camera. Richie has a plan: use the camera to achieve fame and fortune, first as a daytime chat show host but soon deciding that some hilarious video accidents will pry some cash out of Beeeadle. But a discovery of a nudie sex tape of the Prime Minister means a new blackmail opportunity: sandWICHES!

Paul, Mat and Angela bollock on about riots, Aswad, Eddie's sexual fantasies, Richie's TARDIS trousers, home video shows, fire stunts, 90's politicians and the BBC announcing a 4th series of Bottom. Plus the series concludes with... The Talking Bottom Quiz!

Talking Bottom will return soon with a series 3 round up, an ep on Guest House Paradiso and ones on the live shows.

S3E5 - Finger

Richie and Eddie acquire psychopathic Welshman Cannonball Taffy O’Jones’ car keys following a cricket match playing for the Shepherd’s Bush Spudulike Irregulars (second eleven). This is their chance to steal his honeymoon weekend and see how much booze they can put away at the Marveloso Splendido Hotelo. There’s only one drawback - they have to pose as a newly married couple.

Mat, Paul and Angela mull over British holidays, odd title choices, swanky posh hotel names, nazi-based sitcoms, Richie and Eddie as a married couple and getting kicked in the bollocks. Plus; the Talking Bottom quiz!

S3E4 - Dough

Eddie has been holed up in his room for days and Richie has nearly wanked himself blind through boredom. But the fruits of Eddie's labours are worth it: he's been forging money. With Spudgun and Hedgehog in tow they head to the Lamb and Flag to test out the pornagraphic doodles, soon finding themselves in the firing line of forger Skullcrusher Henderson. There's only one solution: enter the pub quiz and cheat!

Angela, Paul and Mat talk about Richie's reading habits, Star Wars actor Mark Hamill loving Bottom, crotches on fire, drinking pernod and re-using condoms. Plus: the fiendishly difficult Talking Bottom quiz!

S3E3 - Break

Richie and Eddie are planning their holiday to sunny Doncaster - all Richie has to do is lose a shitload of weight. Luckily they got a Luftwaffe book of exercises and a vacuum cleaner for some DIY liposuction so Richie can fit snugly into his thong. Soon, Eddie is legless - first thanks to a chainsaw wielded by Richie and later because he's in the pube with the holiday monkey. Will they build up enough strength to lift the fridge off the floor and get a look at Des Lynam's todger?

Paul, Mat and Angela discuss iTunes screeners, alternative takes, drinking the contents of the drip tray, cartoon violence, shaky sets and musical stings. Plus: the Talking Bottom Quiz!

S3E2 - Terror

Trick or ruddy treat! It's Halloween and for Richie and Eddie this means an opportunity to don fancy dress and make some cash (no sweets) to fund a party. But they can't even keep their meagre haul of apples with razor blades in due to the local kids robbing and kicking the shit out of them, and a faulty cattle prod soon means Richie is down to his last pair of tights. But things look up as the party gets into full swing complete with homebrew, exploding carrots, sprouts mexicane and an attempt at raising the devil in exchange for an eternity of shagging.

Mat, Paul and Angela ruminate on Halloween costumes, child actors, double entrendres, which Bottom series fans fall in love with, and how a man with kids can possibly be a virgin. Plus: the Talking Bottom quiz Halloween edition!